


Gratitude

by kiss_me_cassie



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, Episode: s03e21 We Killed Yamamoto, F/M, Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-01-02
Updated: 2004-01-02
Packaged: 2019-05-15 12:47:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14790797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiss_me_cassie/pseuds/kiss_me_cassie
Summary: He cherished her compassion at the same time that he wondered what he had done to deserve it.





	Gratitude

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

Summary: Her simple presence had calmed his tortured thoughts.

 

FB is greatly appreciated

Disclaimers: Josh, Donna and everyone else belong to AS and a whole lot of other people. Sadly, they are not mine...

 

**********

 

~ _True or false, Josh? My life would be better right now if you and your girlfriend swapped jobs. Why is it for every good thing you do around here, we have to endure three screw-ups? Sorry doesn't get me 218. It doesn't get back the ad that slipped through your office, any more than it gets back tobacco, which you gave away for lunch money_. ~ 

  

The words played over and over in his mind. He deserved the President's contempt. He was failing. He had let his personal life overshadow his professional life and he was failing miserably at both. And he wasn't quite sure how to fix either. 

  

He remembered the conversation he had with Amy on his front steps. 

  

_~ I'm not good at this. ~_

_~ I wanted to do this, so I studied. ~_

_~ I never learned... ~_  
 

And he hadn't, so now he felt as if he were failing at Relationships 101, as well.

  

He clicked off his desk lamp and turned his chair to face the window. He thought about all the good he had accomplished so far, and balanced it against all the mistakes he had made, including this latest catastrophe. So much that he had done outweighed this issue, but his heart was heavy and he wouldn't let the scales tip in his favor. 

  

He sensed Donna's presence and he turned to see her standing in the doorway. The backlighting from the bullpen and the dimness of the office made it difficult for him to see her face clearly. He was grateful that the same shadows hid his own face and the weariness he knew must be showing. 

  

"Josh? You're still here?" she asked, concern evident in her voice. 

  

"Yeah." He turned back to the window, looking out at the dark, starless night, thinking about how he could fix things. She didn't leave, but she seemed to understand his need for quiet and simply took a seat in one of the guest chairs. They sat this way for several moments until she broke the silence. 

  

"I heard about what happened in the Oval. I'm sorry." 

  

And he knew that she genuinely was sorry. Not the way that Ed and Larry were sorry, an almost skittish response to witnessing one of their own being yelled at by the President. Or the way that Sam was sorry, half-hearted sympathy from someone else who had made mistakes recently. Donna's sorrow was born of genuine feeling. It hurt her to see him hurting. And he cherished her compassion at the same time that he wondered what he had done to deserve it. 

  

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing anymore," he confessed in a whisper. 

  

"I think you do," she answered simply. 

  

He turned in his chair and looked at her intently. There was no subterfuge in her expression, just a wordless understanding. "How?" 

  

"Because you're doing what's best for this administration. I know you don't like the marriage incentives. Neither do I. But you know they need to be included to get the job done," she explained. 

  

Again, he searched her face, looking for a hint of scorn or sarcasm. He found none, just a simple acceptance. He sensed that she wanted to say more, but she lowered her gaze, refusing him deeper access to her thoughts. 

  

"I should go. It's late." She stood and started toward the door. 

  

"Donna, wait." 

 

She paused, her hand on the door jam, her back to him. 

  

"Thank you."  
  

His words startled her and she turned around. "For what?" 

  

"For being here. For understanding. For... everything." Her eyes lit up at his words and he was glad he had spoken. Her expression, her smile, made him feel better. Her simple presence had calmed his tortured thoughts and for that alone he was grateful. 

  

"You're welcome." And with one last gentle smile, she left. 


End file.
